| Just some random things swimming in my head :) |
From Evernote: |
10 things I've never wanted to do |
1. Skydive: I've always been a firm believer in "if we were supposed to fly we would have had wings" plus I really can't seem to think of what I would tell God when I show up to explain why I decided to jump out of a plane.
2. Rockclimbing: Also a firm believer in "if we were supposed to be climbing rocks we would be mountain goats" Risking my life just to say that I climbed some big rock just doesn't justify it for me. There is no pot of gold, beautiful women, or prize at the top...just a stark reminder that now you have to figure out how to climb down.
3. White river rapids: I'm gonna go ahead and continue with my system of firm beliefs and say "if we were supposed to be able to swim and survive waters dangerous enough to kill anything it touches then we would have gills and armored fins" and since we don't I'm gonna go ahead and save this activity to the crazed white people of the world.
4. Get a tattoo: Please explain to me why you feel the need to have a stranger or friend take a needle and some ink to your skin to draw pictures on you? Stabbing my skin with pictures is a pretty extreme way of expressing yourself.
Could you not buy some art?
Hell have temporary tats done..
Buy clothes that express you
Celebrate halloween more often
I dunno just not look like a complete douche
5. Be a cop: I can't see myself being public enemy #1. I can't ruin peoples lives on constant basis. I can't see myself trying to act better than the next man. I can't see myself upholding what other people think is the law and what's right. No ladies and gentlemen, I won't be that guy. Plus I'm not an asshole.
6. Swim with the sharks: I am a nature lover, but from afar. Especially if it involves anything that can cause any type of harm to me. Take something as beautiful and majestic as a....shark. yup thousands of pounds of evolutionized killing machine right in front of your eyes. Ever see those guys in those shark cages? Yeah well u won't ever see this brownguy there. Placing me in front of a killing machine the size of an escalade in its natural habitat doesn't sound like a vacation to me.
7. Ride a Hot air balloon: Chalk this one up with "if we were suppoed to be floating so high in the air surrounded by flammable gas we would have been naturally"
8. Play a Ouija board: Something about opening a portal to a world we were never supposed to be involved in just doesn't tickle my pickle. Never have I said "you know what?" Let's open a door to the underworld and ask spirits those hard to know answers! Nope sorry, u can keep that shit to yourself.
9. Be a Doctor: Call me a pussy but the minute that I see blood or someones' insides I am jello. Have you ever seen an operation on tv? Excuse me while I throw up.
10. Be a Gynocologist: Sorry guys, but this show should be on the discovery network under "real dirty jobs". Something about examining chochi and the many possible issues and problems from every species of woman that sits on that chair that just doesn't put a smile on my face. As a younger kid you would joke around as this being your favorite job but being older you realize its all just in theory and you will never get that porn star moment at work.
2. Rockclimbing: Also a firm believer in "if we were supposed to be climbing rocks we would be mountain goats" Risking my life just to say that I climbed some big rock just doesn't justify it for me. There is no pot of gold, beautiful women, or prize at the top...just a stark reminder that now you have to figure out how to climb down.
3. White river rapids: I'm gonna go ahead and continue with my system of firm beliefs and say "if we were supposed to be able to swim and survive waters dangerous enough to kill anything it touches then we would have gills and armored fins" and since we don't I'm gonna go ahead and save this activity to the crazed white people of the world.
4. Get a tattoo: Please explain to me why you feel the need to have a stranger or friend take a needle and some ink to your skin to draw pictures on you? Stabbing my skin with pictures is a pretty extreme way of expressing yourself.
Could you not buy some art?
Hell have temporary tats done..
Buy clothes that express you
Celebrate halloween more often
I dunno just not look like a complete douche
5. Be a cop: I can't see myself being public enemy #1. I can't ruin peoples lives on constant basis. I can't see myself trying to act better than the next man. I can't see myself upholding what other people think is the law and what's right. No ladies and gentlemen, I won't be that guy. Plus I'm not an asshole.
6. Swim with the sharks: I am a nature lover, but from afar. Especially if it involves anything that can cause any type of harm to me. Take something as beautiful and majestic as a....shark. yup thousands of pounds of evolutionized killing machine right in front of your eyes. Ever see those guys in those shark cages? Yeah well u won't ever see this brownguy there. Placing me in front of a killing machine the size of an escalade in its natural habitat doesn't sound like a vacation to me.
7. Ride a Hot air balloon: Chalk this one up with "if we were suppoed to be floating so high in the air surrounded by flammable gas we would have been naturally"
8. Play a Ouija board: Something about opening a portal to a world we were never supposed to be involved in just doesn't tickle my pickle. Never have I said "you know what?" Let's open a door to the underworld and ask spirits those hard to know answers! Nope sorry, u can keep that shit to yourself.
9. Be a Doctor: Call me a pussy but the minute that I see blood or someones' insides I am jello. Have you ever seen an operation on tv? Excuse me while I throw up.
10. Be a Gynocologist: Sorry guys, but this show should be on the discovery network under "real dirty jobs". Something about examining chochi and the many possible issues and problems from every species of woman that sits on that chair that just doesn't put a smile on my face. As a younger kid you would joke around as this being your favorite job but being older you realize its all just in theory and you will never get that porn star moment at work.
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